Monday, December 22, 2008
Petting zoo goats are like stuck-up celebrities with horns
Petting zoos are a hotbed of animal hubris. With children constantly saying how cute they are, it's important to let the goats know that not everybody is on their dicks 24/7. This dandy here hasn't gotten nearly enough humble pie, because he apparently thinks he's next in line on the runway in fucking Milan. Ummm, not every goat just gets to lie around all day waiting for little 6 year olds to come and rub them behind the ears. Some goats actually have to work hard all day to find 6 year olds to rub them behind the ears.
What I'm trying to say, Goat, is that you can't have this carrot. I know I promised it to you earlier in a moment of weakness, but I also know goats can't use tape recorders, and there are limited legal avenues that you can pursue. TIME TO FEND FOR YOURSELF, GOAT. Hey- no- stop doing that! Ah... dammit.
Posted by bza at 10:48 AM