Friday, December 19, 2008

Thanks for "gracing" us with your presence


I get it, Whale, you're busy. I've only been on this FUCKING BOAT for three and a half hours waiting for you, and the only thing I've seen so far is my lunch from earlier. It's not like you spend your entire goddamn life in the ocean, so I see why you would only come up for basically a split second. Personally, if someone was going to all this trouble specifically to see me, I would take time out of my BUSY ASS SCHEDULE to at least stop by the boat and make some small talk, maybe have some salmon. But I understand, Whale, places to go, 500 pounds of food to eat. I'll be fine. The real question here, Whale, is will you be fine? Can you really live with yourself? Maybe you need to make a change.

50 comments:

SlapsBrats said...

I went whale watching once, and I think the whales were purposefully mocking us from about 50 feet below the surface. These fat bastards think they're the elite of the oceans, and treat us like paparrazi swine. Well you know what Whale? Fuck you, that's what!

daftbrian said...

best. blog. ever.

Breanne said...

clearly my new favorite blog. YES.

Jennifer said...

Whales have an enlarged ego. Ever since "Free Willy" they think they're the shit. Especially those orca bastards. Fuck orcas. They are so fucking vein. They should spend a day in a sperm whale's shoes and see how it feels to be ugly bastards.

RandyG said...

Whales are selfish manipulative bastards...acting all extinct, like oooooh save me, save me!

Fuck you whale.

Cindy said...

Whales... who needs them!

molly said...

(asshole...!)

ghostswanted said...

Specifically this is an ORCA whale, native to the Puget Sound. Also known as killer whales. Very rare to see. I've lived in the NW for over twenty years and only have seen two orcas, and I'm on that San Juan Island ferry all the fucking time. FUCK YOU, ORCA!

chesh said...

Fuck you! You shiny-ass lipless bastard, go eat some fucking plankton.

Montagne Mointaigne said...

I really miss justalittleguy.blogspot.com.

The Rougman said...

What sort of self respecting mammal drinks water that fish have shat in?

You ain't all that, Orca. Bite me.

Dunesdreamer said...

Wait a minute...what's that I see in the background? A Japanese tuna boat?

Say good-fucking night, Gracie.

Metalia said...

This is my favorite one to date.

arianita said...

brilliant hahaha

H. said...

My friend let his hippie wife buy a little fart of a dog, and then name it Orca. Cuz she lurvs them whales.

Jackie said...

and you know what else? my fucking can of tuna tasted a whole lot better when those arrogant jagoffs where mooshed-up in there!

Ryan said...

What I'd like to know is where the fuck this DOLPHIN gets off calling itself a WHALE in the first place. A toothy cetacean does not a whale make. Asshole.

Jaywalker said...

Also, call that a "song"? I don't fucking think so. My ears are bleeding. Who do you think you are, whale? Britney fucking Spears?
I'm not angry. I'm just so damn disappointed.

Charles said...

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





"Fuck you!" No, no, FUCK YOU!

hutch1200 said...

Looks like a fuckin' sea Zebra. Or a gang banger in a wetsuit. "Yo, look out, I'm da gangsta killa whale". Fuck you Willie. You're gonna chill in a net soon enough. Those Asian fisherman don't give a shit. You're worth what you weigh, fatso.

N1K said...

All these whales can $uck my Moby Dick

cassaundra said...

that fat whale bastard.

trickrodd said...

I hate whales, but at least they're not dolphins. FUCK DOLPHINS! Stupid fish.

AK said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AK said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
laughykate said...

OH, be kind - he's just a giant fish who would rather be a panda bear.

Think of it like the sea version of the cat lady. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jocelyn_Wildenstein

rose said...

and what's with the built-in mask? who does he think he is? a fucking bandit? like no one would notice that fat bastard trying to rob a bank.
i mean he LOOKS LIKE A COP CAR!!!

oh and BEST BLOG EVER.

Nancy Coppock said...

Like you, FYP, I went whale watching off the Gloucester coast. I was looking so hard for signs of whale activity, I almost saw my own lunch again. Finally, some whales did show up for work.

Did you know that the whale's tail is called a fluke? I guess that's because it was a FLUKE we even saw you out cavorting in the big ocean, giving us the whale tail symbol of the Flying Fickle Finger of Fate!

Hey, we paid good money to come see you, and you give us the flip-off? Is that any way to run a capitalist enterprise, Whale? I mean don't you have the slightest clue about customer service? Whaz up, whale? You think dissin' your customer is gonna get you flying around in customized jets with those special tanks for endangered species?

Y'gotta please the customer, whale, that's they way the whole free enterprise thing works. Y'think I owe you something, whale? How about the friggin' $35 bucks I shelled out just to see you? I'm never going to shop in your ocean again, and I'm going to tell all my friends to do the same!

Aleya said...

Well, you can't trust someone dressed in black and white... there's a reason those were prison colours. Fuckin' whales... Free Willy? I think not. Send Willy to the chair? You fuckin' betcha!

Gastronome said...

Whale, your fucking dorsal fin would look and taste great in my soup. The eskimos can have your blubber.

Han Solo thought you smelled bad on the outside...

Madame Letharge said...

This beautiful whale is an evil prima donna. Just phoning it in.

Mark Johnston said...

You're killing me! Love the blog.

ns said...

save the whales? no, fuck the whales.

Nathalie & Nicole said...

try a beluga whale...canadian beluga whale..they are attention whores

Dorid said...

Somewhere a whale is laughing at you

PetrePan said...

HAHAHA FTW stands for fuck the whales and for the win. FTW FTW

products said...

China Wholesalers has been described as the world’s factory. buy products wholesaleThis phenomenom is typified by the rise ofbusiness. Incredible range of products available with China Wholesale “Low Price and High Quality” not only reaches directly to their target clients worldwide but also ensures that wholesale from china from China means margins you cannot find elsewhere and China Wholesale will skyroket your profits.china wholesale productsbuy china wholesalewholesale chinawholesale productsbuy products

products said...

We offer designer , custom wedding dress, cheap cell phonescheap wedding dressesbridal gowns, wedding gowns, Flower Girl Dresses andwholesale cell phonesso on. Buy tailor-made anddesigner wedding dresses designer to be a special brides now!

products said...

Wholesale Gemstone cheap Gemstone Jewelry from China, discount wholesale jewelry Beads, wholesale Gemstone jewelry cheapest Wholesale Naruto anime and manga cheap cosplay costumes, cheap Naruto cosplay costumes on sale, buy Naruto cosplay naruto online shop.Wholesale anime and manga wholesale crystal jewelry costumes, cheap cosplay costumes on sale, buy anime cosplay costumes online shop

monkeyboy said...

You what? You claim you're just big boned and all you eat is salad. Liar.

Qaliqo said...

I should have known. Of course, the products panda has gotten to the orca, too. Must be a black and white unity thing. We know you're a dolphin, orca, you aren't fooling anyone. Wait, most of the commentary indicates buying into your lie about being a "killer" whale. You're just another douchebag dolphin, and hawking cheap dresses and fake watches from Chinese panda won't change anything. Do the world a favor and beach yourself in search of penguin. Lying dickhead tool!

sa said...

AV,無碼,a片免費看,自拍貼圖,伊莉,微風論壇,成人聊天室,成人電影,成人文學,成人貼圖區,成人網站,一葉情貼圖片區,色情漫畫,言情小說,情色論壇,臺灣情色網,色情影片,色情,成人影城,080視訊聊天室,a片,A漫,h漫,麗的色遊戲,同志色教館,AV女優,SEX,咆哮小老鼠,85cc免費影片,正妹牆,ut聊天室,豆豆聊天室,聊天室,情色小說,aio,成人,微風成人,做愛,成人貼圖,18成人,嘟嘟成人網,aio交友愛情館,情色文學,色情小說,色情網站,情色,A片下載,嘟嘟情人色網,成人影片,成人圖片,成人文章,成人小說,成人漫畫,視訊聊天室,性愛

Anna said...

Man, I completely agree with this. On a boat for hours trying to see whales and then one popped up on the opposite side of the boat and by the time I ran over there it was gone and never came back.

Also, Orca's are not whales they are technically dolphins. So, fuck you dolphin!

LAN said...

puma mens shoes
puma shoes
puma speed
nike shoes
nike air
nike air shoes
nike air max 90
nike air max 95
nike air max tn
nike air rift
nike shox r4
nike air max 360
nike shox nz
puma cat
air max trainers
mens nike air max
sports shoes
nike air rifts
nike air rift trainer
nike air
nike shoes air max
nike shoes shox
air shoes
Lucyliu IS Lucyliu
nike shoe cart
puma future
cheap puma
nike rift
jeans shop
diesel jeans
levis jeans
nike rift shoes
cheap nike air rifts
bape shoes

Trev said...

a killer whale is actually a dolphin, not a whale!!!

ibrahim said...

Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli sitelergecikme
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolmaz
Sohbet merkezi chat merkezi
Sesli merkezi sesli Sohbet merkezi
Sesli chat merkezi Sohbetmerkezi
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Seslimuhabbet sesli muhabbet
alim satim alis veris
alim satim alis veristhanks

ibrahim said...

Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.

ibrahim said...

Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.

ibrahim said...

Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatgor
SesliSohbetsendeSesliChatbize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
SeslibeklemeChatyoksa
Sohbetpismankamerali Chatolursun
kamerali SohbetamaSesli siteleris isten
Sohbet sitelerigecmisChat siteleriolacak thanks.
Sesli panelgelSesli Chat panellerigor
SeslipanelsendeSesli sohbet panelleribize
Sesli Sohbet sitelerikatilSesli Chat sitelerihadi
Sohbet panelleribeklemeChat panelleriyoksa
panelpismandunya panelolursun
speaky panelamaSpeakypanelis isten
sesli sohbetgecmissesli chatolacak thanks.
diyarbakirgecmisdiyarbakir gazeteleri
Sesli şehir Seslişehir
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatthanks
Sesli SohbetsendeSesli Chatgor
Sesli SohbetdurmaSesli Chatgor
Sesli SohbetgelSesli Chatthanks

John Legacy said...

Thanks for sharing, much appreciated and useful post, congrat and keep on track!
Cialis Online