Friday, March 6, 2009
Ostriches amuse only themselves
Ostrich, seriously, I am not taken in by your "crazy guy" look with the fuzzy hair and the silly grin. You are like the late era Robin Williams of birds. YOU HAVE NO EDGE, OSTRICH, STICK TO THE MIDDLING DRAMAS ABOUT MENTORS AND SADNESS.
But, alas, the ostrich will never know that its days have come and gone. Similar to the grandfather that makes terrible jokes that no one finds funny, but people laugh at them to not make him feel bad, ostriches walk around like they are the funniest damn thing since camels, and everybody goes along with it because they could literally slice open your entire fucking body. The best thing to do when an ostrich like this one approaches you and is all "Do you believe my legs and neck are so long, but my body is like a big ball? I mean, it's totally out of control!!" is to be like "Ha, yeah! It is pretty funny," but if he gives you one of these, quickly follow it up with, "But, you know, you really are very dignified," and then drop to the ground, cover your head and neck, and hope they don't stand on you for too long.
Posted by bza at 7:01 AM