Monday, May 18, 2009
Why are you doing this to me?
Yes. Okay? Yes. I want to come sit on the hammock. Are you happy? This whole situation is just awful, ever since I found this photo I've been a complete mess. I've started calling up people in the neighborhood who have hammocks and asking them if they've had any bear visits lately. I hired the CIA to evaluate the photo and figure out what type of trees are in the background so I can figure out what is the most likely location of the hammock. Do you have any idea how much time it takes to recreate a photo in a three dimensional holographic workspace?
Jesus Christ, Bear, not only are you forcing me into this situation, you are making me come up with cutesy fucking headlines like "I thought you said you were going to mow the lawn" and "Sleepy the Bear says only you can prevent afternoon napping." I HAVE A REPUTATION TO UPHOLD, BEAR. Get off the hammock and go eat something with blood in it so I can think about the dichotomy between your cuteness and your insatiable thirst for flesh.
Posted by bza at 5:56 AM