Monday, July 13, 2009
Baby rhinos better milk it while they can
I see what you're doing here, Baby Rhino. We ALL see what you're doing here. You think by having a mouth that looks sewn on and legs that appear to be taken from a dining room table from the 19th century you can be so ugly that you'll come back around to cute and we'll all forget how ridiculous you look and rhinos will get more publicity and start getting work in show business. BIG MISTAKE, BABY RHINO. Listen, maybe if you didn't grow up into a hulking mass of skin and bones that couldn't pose its way out of a paper bag then this strategy might work.
As it stands, Baby Rhino, your big gamble is just one giant piece of fucking fail. Well, don't expect me to wait around to see your next attempt, Baby Rhino. I've got better things to do with my time than sit around looking at pictures of baby animals trying to be cute all day, and so does everyone else on the internet. CLOCK'S TICKING, BABY RHINO, WHAT'S YOUR PLAN.
Oh, dear God. NOT RUNNING AWKWARDLY WHILE SMILING AT THE CAMERA. What the - PUT THAT AWAY. Wait a second. HOW DID YOU TURN INTO AN OTTER. Fuck you, Baby Rhino.
Posted by bza at 5:42 AM