Monday, August 31, 2009

I can't tell if you're doing that ironically


What's with the stupid pose, Cat? I'm sure you think you are just headed for the Sears catalog now... or you are making fun of people who are headed for the Sears catalog. I'm going to be honest with you, Cat, you look like a total loser, so I really hope this isn't your laid-back-but-sophisticated look.

On the other hand, if you're really trying to make an ironic statement about funny photo portraits in a turn-of-the-century trucker-hat kind of way, then a. I hate you and b. you really should have gone all the way. So either way, fuck you, Cat. The hours of Photoshop I will get out of you cannot heal the part of my soul you have destroyed. But I will try, Cat. I. will. try.

60 comments:

gregoryyy said...

Hah! EH..Cat,you might want to hear this.

The pipe you had in your mouth while you were trying to find the right "shot" is now on the couch...BURNING.
Your left paw looks like a used brillow pad and is starting to sizzle.Whatever Cat.

Eva Gallant said...

I'm speechless, here, cat. What's up with that look?

@eloh said...

What is your "other paw" doing whilst you stare me in the eye.
You dirty boy.

JeffLac said...

The lasers got me good.

M.J. said...

I think I just found my little Papito's father. Papi you're not a bastard anymore!

Glory von Hathor said...

That cat's totally getting ready to neg you. You can tell he's been working that same pose all over LA.

Yawn.

Dunesdreamer said...

It's not the pose that bothers me--hell, my cats pose better than that. It's the fucking ascot.

Diane, Fit to the Finish said...

That's the same look my cat gives me when I say, "here kitty kitty."

hiphophippie.com said...

The self-esteem oozing out of this cat is disgusting.

The Peach Tart said...

Poor cat. I think he's just misunderstood.

Chrissy said...

Bwahahaha. Really, that's all I can say! :)

Sleeping with Ward Cleaver said...

OMG I CANNOT BELIEVE I FOUND YOU!!! I feel as if this is kismet! I would LOVE for you contact me--I have a funny smart ass book coming out in March about my evil parrot with Simon Spotlight Entertainment (WINGING IT: A MEMOIR OF CARING FOR A VENGEFUL PARROT WHO'S DETERMINED TO KILL ME)--pitching it as sort of David Sedaris meets Marley & Me with a deadly beak, and would be so beyond thrilled if you'd consider blurbing me. I hope you aren't so slammed you can't do it...I'd even give you the Clifs notes version if that would help!

I am so stoked to read your book--it sounds awesome! i think you can email me from the link to this but if not reply to me on here (pref not a 'no way in hell' reply, btw) and i'll get you my email addy. thanks!
jennygardiner
www.jennygardiner.net

Entrepreneur Chick said...

I'd laugh even if I wasn't having a beer. Great photoshop.

Mike! said...

Here's a fact: All cats are assholes. This just proves it.

It's All Good said...

Cat.

funnychickscratch.com said...

This cat is awfully smug for someone who is probably upside down in his kitty condo payments. Good luck on your short sell you arrogant s.o.b.

misha1234 said...

This cat thinks he's the shit. Well, you're not cat!

Tom said...

Fuck Cats

frigginloon said...

This is same friggin look my pussy gives when he's scratched the shit out of my couch. And don't think I can't see you flipping the bird.

Miss M. said...

I bet the cat's name is Baron or something pompous like that ! lol

I like is self-confidence ! :)

WR said...

Dear Cat:
Don't let all the arrogant sophistication go to your head - your litter still stinks!

HC said...

There's a human hiding inside that cat...

bindifry said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
bindifry said...

mine also does that.

woolanthropy said...

That's the most interesting cat in the world. I am just wondering where the Dos Equis is.

ThomasPhillip said...

that cat is the man. (very confident)

L. said...

Yeah, he's smug. That cat has had his way with all of the 2009 Penthouse Pets and most of the Pussycat Dolls.

Deiter said...

I bet he is squeezing one out on the couch as he sits there.

getyourcuteon said...

Does anyone know how this picture got Lazerized? I have so many pictures I must do this too! Just for the record I think the cat was being ironic!

Mom said...

Shouldn't that fucker go catch a mouse or something?

Fuck You, Penguin said...

For the laser inclined:

http://steeez.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/laserbackground.jpg

hirakendu said...

;)

Mark. said...

seriously?? come on, they're ANIMALS. All you people here are taking this blog WAYYY to seriously... i mean, i really don't see the point of criticizing animals that don't even know what they're doing..... this blog is really..... disgusting.

maria said...

Can't you tell by the posé?
The fucker knows just what he is doing. trixy kitty's.

David said...

This is the kind of cat you would never want to introduce to your girlfriend

Loreley said...

Oh my, he's the Most Interesting Man in the Cat World. People hang on his every word, even the prepositions.
He can disarm you with his looks…or his hands…either way.

Be still, my heart...lol

Nakia said...

@Mark

I think you're the only one here taking it seriously. Think about it.

gregoryyy said...

Oh Mark,they KNOW.

(see Mailbag Otter for details)

CatLadyLarew said...

So, where's the cocktail for his other paw?

kentuckyliz said...

That cat is saying, Bitch, where's my newspaper?

psychiceveryday said...

Actually, he looks like he's auditioning for the "Most interesting man in the world" beer commercial. And this cat is also messing with us. I can feel the contempt all the way over here.

sonali said...

We write so different.....u write fiction i write truth, u write humour i write practical hardship, u write for fun i write for people to realise wats wrong with da society......so after writting on serious stuff, i come here to read and relax maself....u r an awesome writter dude.....loved ur blog :)

sonali said...

By they way thats da gangsta luk dis pussy is givin, lol...i mean da cat :P

Oemissions said...

Quit shitting in my plants!

Agente Provocatrice said...

Cooldog did this first, then it was Coolbaby via Lamebook, get some fucking original material you feline piece of apathy!

Andrew Littler said...

Oh my God, I burst out laughing (and continued doing so for 15 minutes) just from reading that cats caption.

MotherMayhem2x said...

Oh hey, I was just sleeping. You don't fool me cat!!! I peeked around the book case and saw you arrange yourself. You'd like us to believe that you don't TRY to be cute. Well I know the deal and there is nothing cute about you.

Braden Rosner said...

I prefer a cat that is the "fat, useless, roll over on your feet because I serve no other purpose in life" type.

Am I right?

Jet Fisher said...

great, the caption/photo combo made me laugh so suddenly that snot bubbles came out of both of my nostrils. good thing I am reading this on a slaptop in the bathroom as tissue is within reach.

Rico said...

Cat, you're such a douche bag. Why do you have to be one of those animals that leans over to talk to the table next to you? GET BACK TO YOUR OWN DINNER, CAT! Here's the fucking ketchup now go away.

Mike said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
acdoyler said...

Is that the Robert Goulet cat or the Will Ferrill cat playing the Robert Goulet cat? Coconut Bangers Ball: It's a Rap!

El Caganer said...

My cat eats porch meat.

Alyssa said...

Laser cat = AMAZING. nice work.

Lap of Luxury Pet and Home Care said...

I think the Cat is just waiting for you to BRING IT!

Hem said...

فاتورة التليفون

منتديات بانوراما مصر منتدى مصرى للحوار

rustyoneill said...

fuck you puto. dat is why in my con-try, they put you in da box and kick you down the street. F-ing puto, stupid wey! if i eber see joo I'n gonna freaking kill you in jour face. !Pendajo!

rustyoneill said...

Fuck you puto! stupid gato, joo tink jur kool ehn? no-boddy like joo okaaye! Dat is why in my con-tree, we putd joo in a box and kick-ing joou down da freakking streeet! Eff-ing wey. Ifb i eber see joo on the street i'n gonna kill joo. Pendajo!

Justin said...

HEY, YOU MEANT TO SAY "ALL THE WAY". DUMMY!

Chloe Edwards said...

Bloody hell looks like my cat! My cat is a grump who hates me mind you.