Friday, August 14, 2009

You'll take Manhattan when you pry it out of my cold, dead hands


This dog's name is Snapdragon, which not coincidentally is the PERFECT FUCKING NAME for this Muppet-looking motherfucker. I was sent in this picture by a person pretending to be the owner, but honestly is there any possible way this is a real dog? And if it is a real dog, it should be taken away because it is clearly fucking out of its mind high. THERE IS NO WAY I'M COMING TO SIT ON THAT COUCH WITH YOU, DOG. I don't care how many episodes of Planet Earth you have cued up.

**This Fuck You, Penguin post has been brought to you by the letter "L"**

38 comments:

The only frog with his own blog said...

OOH MY GOD.. I WANT TO CRY.. THIS DOG IS NOT FAIR.. I am ruined..

dmf said...

he looks so smug. like a smug muppet. a smuppet.

tea_please said...

Have you seen the 9th Configuration?
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0081237/ It's worth watching anyway but in it there's a dude who has cast Hamlet with dog actors. The lead dog looks like THIS dog (well, but covered in mop strings)!

El said...

I think he kinda looks like John McCain.

Naka said...

u always crack me up ^^

that dog does look very smug with itself too :P

M.J. said...

@El He does kinda look like McCain! Scary.

hiphophippie.com said...

I wish the person who has his arm up that dog's ass, making his head and mouth move would get a life.

Gaina said...

What you see on that dog's face is not adoration for his master. He is merely trying to decide how many pounds you weigh so he can figure out how long you'll take in the oven.

He's evil I tell you. Eeeeeviiiillll.

Nathalie said...

Freedom ain't free dog! It takes a buck o' five...You're making the bald eagles cry! EVERYWHERE. Get off the couch. Looking regal is not a job!

frigginloon said...

Geez, it's hard getting a good taxidermist these days. I think he should have made his friggin eyes wider for starters.

The Peach Tart said...

I think he looks stoned.

chaobell said...

Oh Jesus Christ. I can't even pretend to hate this dog. I just want to make kissy noises at him and ruffle him all over. I bet he feels like a lambskin rug.

randomaspect said...

Could Snapdragon perhaps be one of those Hollywood children? I didn't hear much about THIS guy after his run of success was over
http://l.yimg.com/g/images/spaceball.gif
You be the judge.

peedee said...

He's fucking adorable in a very very creepy way.

Grace Matthews said...

I think he has to fart!

Beckett said...

This dog is exactly why this blog is important.

You know why THIS dog is dangerous? Because I would kill targets of the dog's choice if that mother-fucker would sing "Rainbow Connection" to me.

Please tell me where he lives so I can avoid this danger.

No really - I promise I won't go over there to see if he sings.

foxy said...

what was that, doggie? you want to share that doobie you just smoked with me? uh, okay....

wait. i'm pretty sure that's a ploy. RESIST TEMPTATION AT ALL COST!

Dunesdreamer said...

Apparently, Shari Lewis isn't dead....

Loreley said...

Fuck it! Snapdragon is all kinds of adorable. There, I said it.

*hangs head in shame*

I. G. said...

This fucking dog is vomit inducingly cute. I hope ends his fucking life in a fucking Chinese restaurant's kitchen.

HC said...

Cute toydog...

Karl said...

Y'know how some people say "obviously photoshopped" to everything? This "dog" is obviously a sock puppet.

girl6 said...

Oh, man! That dude is so baked! He just totally dusted a fat spliff. Look, he's all ike, "Wait...what?"

Fuckin' bogart.

That's bogus, bro. Not cool, Fluffy. Not cool.

WR said...

He kind of looks like Obama...it's that Mona Lisa smile.

But...he probably just ate his human's dinner and they don't know it yet.

The Igloo Oven said...

Snapdragon looks much like the imaginary dog I blame my farts on.

Entrepreneur Chick said...

I don't know. I'm dog sensative today. I wish you had a cute frog or a panda bear to comment on- oh, I'm all furious over Micheal Vick being picked up by the Eagles.
"Aww, HELL NO, PHIL EAGLES!"
http://entrepreneurchick.blogspot.cm
Can you find the panda or the frog tomorrow please?

Alexis said...

That dog has all kinds of wickedness up its sleeve. I bet that fucker actually has sleeves. He probably tore them off his last victim.

jules said...

That dog is absolutely, positively hands down high! (And adorable, but definitely high)

hirakendu said...

;)

Christy said...

dead. this fucking dog killed me.

Hopelessly Imperfect said...

I'd watch Planet Earth with this dog

GhostFolk.com said...

This is not a dog. You really messed up. This is a photo of Fred MacMurray at, as best I can tell, age 12.

Glory von Hathor said...

Pah. I'm going to be singing the theme tune to Fraggle Rock all bloody day now. Damn you Snapdragon. Damn you and your Henson-like face.

Mike! said...

If this dog isn't a Muppet, it wants to be one in the worst way. What's the worst way? Do you want someone's hand up your ass? Just look at that expression, nothing else says I want a hand up my ass quite like that stupid fucking smile does.

Jonathan said...

This thing's gotta be out of an Ikea catalog. Maybe you can buy a dog prop from their store for decoration.

Kate Hanke said...

That dog looks like it was a perfect stuffed animal that someone brought to life! I never knew there was such cuteness out there. My head might just explode from it all!

Michael said...

I think this dog is plotting another attack against the US.

Look at his face, trying to play cute when in reality, he's developing a master plan to conquer the world and destroy it with his hidden talons.

I see you Muppet, looking into my eyes because you know that I know your story. You're going down, Bitch, yea you're going down!

dean10003 said...

The Gund Tag has been photoshopped out.