Friday, October 23, 2009

Confiscated for evidence


This blog is now the property of the Antarctic Police Department. Once everything is bagged and tagged in a few days it will be released back into the internet wild.

Thank you for your cooperation.

42 comments:

Ali said...

About time you coppers! Throw the book at the penguin!

Ben M. said...

I can only assume you mean the FU Penguin book?

Eva Gallant said...

What took you so long?

yellaalley95 said...

It's about time!

The Velvet Milkman said...

WHAT? But will it migrate back to FUP headquarters? Please say yes! We know you're out there, Matt!

Rico said...

After the devastating loss of the Leopard Seals and Immortal-Sharks, it was realized that the use of force was not going to resolve the situation. Therefore, former US president Bill Clinton was asked to intervene and this afternoon, negotiations yielded a cease-fire agreement between Penguin and Human forces. Charges of "Impersonating Something with Hands" were dropped in exchange for hostage release. At least one source has suggested, however, that the human captive was complicit with his capture as a hoaxy way to promote his new book. Reactions to these allegations from the hostage have yet to come forth but faithful readers were heard to say "stop this shtick dude" and "boo . . . boo on you!"

Rico said...

Press Release: It has now come forth that former US president Bill Clinton has been accused of inter-species sexual activity while negotiating in the Antarctic. Apparently, after hearing about "Fuck You, Penguin" he thought to himself "sounds like a good idea!" Diplomatic Immunity will likely spare him from any charges but PETA (not to be confused with PETAP) members are furious. When asked for comment, Hillary Clinton stated "I don't know but I've been told . . . Penguin pussy is mighty cold!"

Trooper Thorn said...

The Antarctic government is just upset by being snubbed by the Olympic Committee again!

Tanya922 said...

You are insane, I love it lol

Rachel said...

I love this. It gets better & better.

sharazad said...

They'll get off. Those penguins and their high priced attorneys...they never get what they deserve.

rgdaniel said...

Penguins are like religion... I know they're out there, and that's fine, but I'd rather not have pro-penguin rhetoric shoved in my face... looking forward to a return to the natural order of things

Chitownmez said...

Yes! Finally! Now let's get back to destroying the frail mentality of some poor, helpless Dingo, shall we?

(p.s. Rico, I heart you)

Aleutie said...

I hate to throw water on your parade, but you arrested the wrong penguin. But what can one expect from the Antarctic Police?

J.M. Ferretti said...

This needs to get settled ASAP! I'm not buying the fucking book until I know who gets the $$$!!!

(Make sure it's donated to a kitty charity.)

Damn cat, walking on the keyboard again!!!

frigginloon said...

I've got a friggin penguin sex tape you little f***kers and I am not afraid to use it! Sorry Letterman, but it's of national security!

WR said...

Is that a have-a-heart trap that PC Penguin is leaning out of??? Let 'im out and he'll return to a life of human baiting/hating crime. Throw the f'ing key away

the Constantly Dramatic One said...

That pic made me so sad....not that these penguin bastards do not deserve what's coming to them....but still....

peedee said...

lol this is pretty funny. =D

Launa said...

This whole thing is funny beyond words... yes. However, it won't be so funny when the furry little bastards take over. This photo is just a ruse to lull us into a sense of safety. Don't believe it. This obvious cuteness is and has always been a scam. Give us back our human, you horrid, evil penguins.

coolingstar9 said...

Whether the Penguin is going to do in the next few days, we ready do not know.
May be this Penguin is going to do some survey how human beings treating the real penguin, let's see.
Have the nice day, the great penguin, I love you.

bethg said...

Hmmmmm....RICO....as in "Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organization", such as kidnapping and fraud. Am I on to sometning there, Matthew - er, I mean Rico??
Very Machiavellian of you. I knew I liked you.

Luke said...

funny stuff! great site, glad i found it.

Rico said...

bethg, you flatter me but no, I'm just a dude who likes reading (and sharing) sarcastic and dark humour. I heard about this blog on CBC radio (in Canada) in September and thought it was pretty fuckin' funny so I signed up. :)

Arlene said...

Looks like those cheeks are sporting some blush. Penguins need makeup to check into jail? This is one strange looking bird!

Mike! said...

Sure, you look sorry and remorseful now, when there's a camera jammed in your face, but we all know the truth you worthless heartless flightless bastard.
What would Chumly and Mr. Whoopee think of you now? Huh?

Nakia said...

Rico: Brilliant!

Estrella said...

Wow! what a blog!!

booshy said...

So...are they read like, the snowball rights?...does he get a lawyer? Cause if I were him, I'd totally hire a polar bear.

firejerm said...

ya know when the tutorial said to come up with something new. try to find something noone has done before and be original... i dont think this is e.x.a.c.t.l.y what they ment.....

but its still freakin hillarious!!!

philthink said...

you should check out these penguins...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1y5ZYnr5xc

kanishk said...

It has now come forth that former US president Bill Clinton has been accused of inter-species sexual activity while negotiating in the Antarctic Work From Home

nltisme said...

Give it back damned coppers!

El Caganer said...

I poop on penguins.

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davej said...

this bastard penguin i found on youtube thinks its so cute leaping off rocks.. I wished it had fallen and died

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRj6RZ3nFpU

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hahaaa